Das Beste liegt nie hinter uns, sondern vor uns. (Werner Jaeger)

Jumat, 24 Februari 2012

SPOOF

A spoof tells an event with a humorous twist. The main purpose of a spoof is to entertain the readers

The Example of Spoof:

The Zoo Job Story

One day a clown was visiting the zoo and attempted to earn some money by making a street performance. He acted and mimed perfectly some animal acts. As soon as he started to drive a crowd, a zoo keeper grabbed him and dragged him into his office. The zoo keeper explained to the clown that the zoo's most popular gorilla had died suddenly and the keeper was fear that attendance at the zoo would fall off. So he offered the clown a job to dress up as the gorilla until the zoo could get another one. The clown accepted this great opportunity.
So the next morning the clown put on the gorilla suit and entered the cage before the crowd came. He felt that it was a great job. He could sleep all he wanted, played and made fun of people and he drove bigger crowds than he ever did as a clown. He pretended the gorilla successfully.
(Introduction)

However, eventually the crowds were tired of him for just swinging on tires. He began to notice that the people were paying more attention to the lion in the next cage. Not wanting to lose the attention of his audience, he decided to make a spectacular performance. He climbed to the top of his cage, crawled across a partition, and dangled from the top to the lion's cage. Of course, this made the lion furious, but the crowd people loved it.
(Event 1)

At the end of the day the zoo keeper came and gave him a raise for being such a good attraction. Well, this went on for some time, he kept taunting the lion, the audience crowd grew a larger, and his salary kept going up. Then one terrible day happened. When he was dangling over the furious lion, he slipped and fell into the lion cage. The clown was really in big terrible situation. He was terrified.
(Event 2)

Sooner the lion gathered itself and prepared to pounce. The clown was so scared. He could do nothing and he began to run round and round the cage with the lion close and closer behind. Finally, the lion could catch him. The clown started screaming and yelling, "Help me, help me!", but the lion was quick and pounces. The clown soon found himself flat on his back looking up at the angry lion and suddenly he heard a voice from the lion’s mouth;"Shut up you idiot! Do you want to get us both fired?".
(Twist)
 

Causative 'Have'/'Get'


Use causative have when arranging for someone to do something for us
  •   They repaired their car. (they did it themselves)
  •   They had their car repaired. (they arranged for someone to repair it)
  •   I cut my hair yesterday. (I cut it myself)
  •   I had my hair cut yesterday. (I went to the hairdresser)

Use causative have when someone does something to us
  • Bill had his money stolen by thief
 
Use causative have someone do something to talk about giving instruction or orders which is more common in American English
  • I had my assistant type the report
  • I’ll have my lawyer look into it
 
IMPORTANT POINTS!!!
Get is possible instead of have, usually in informal spoken English
I’m going to get my car fixed tomorrow

GET VS HAVE
I got the mechanic to check my brakes.
(At first the mechanic didn’t think it was necessary, but I convinced him to check the brakes)
I had the mechanic check my brakes.
(I asked the mechanic to check the brakes)

Another Example:
  • I’d have my garden weeded and my lawn mowed.
  • I’d have my bedroom redecorated in beautiful oriental sumptuous colors and fabrics.
  • I’d have the evening meal cooked by a professional cook.
  • I’d have my shopping done and the house cleaned from top and bottom every two days.
  • This would leave me time to do the things I enjoy, like reading, chatting to friends, going for walks and playing tennis.
  •  John got Susan to rake the leaves
  • I have been making my kids shovel the sidewalks after every snowfall
  • I have to get my wife to pick me up after work because my car is in for repairs
  • I had my wallet stolen
  • Dr. Smith had his nurse take the patient’s temperature
  • I had the mechanic check the brakes
  • Susie got her son to take the medicine even thought it tasted terrible
  • How can parents get their children to read more?
  • The government TV commercials are trying to get people to stop smoking 
  • I had my washing machine fixed.
  • I got her to let me copy her homework.
  • He’ll get them to arrive before 10 pm.
  • I’ll have it done by tomorrow morning.
  • I had my jacket cleaned yesterday = I got my jacket cleaned.
  • I had my computer fixed = I got my computer fixed.
  • She had her window smashed.